China-focused Satire, Social Commentary, Comics and More

OUR CHINESE SUPERMARKET IS BETTER THAN YOUR SUPERMARKET!

Nanjing, CHINA – The two story meat, veggie and instant noodle mart near our house has always been special with its escalator and “LEG WATCH CARE!” sign. Now it is even better. With the advertised additions of a pool, greased dance floor, and X-treme freestyle cart ramp, Suguo may finally reach that previously unattainable 12-60 age group who would much rather eat the cheaper, preprepared street food than spend time and money at the grocery store or cook for themselves. “Yeah, I guess this place is pretty cool now,” said an elderly man who shuffled happily around the greased dance floor for hours in some slippers he’d found on a rack downstairs. The man drank coke from a plastic bottle in his right hand, spat into an empty one in his left and identified himself as “Grandpa Long Wang” to passing women. Despite claims from a supermarket manager that the sign was meant for “safety reasons only” and that the greased dance floor was “merely the result of a leaking 5 gallon fish oil bucket” the fun continued well past closing. At 11:35 PM Grandpa Long Wang was escorted to the exit. “I’ll definitely be back,” he shouted as the door was locked behind him.

One Response to “OUR CHINESE SUPERMARKET IS BETTER THAN YOUR SUPERMARKET!”

  1. Nick says:

    why are they throwing bowling pins into the water?

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