China-focused Satire, Social Commentary, Comics and More

Dear G. Bush


Dear G. Bush,

We apologize for your given title (the G, of course, is short for Garbage), which we realize is unfortunately similar to the name of our infamous leader, the number 1 American, the grand dunce of Washington, G.W. Bush, who, for slightly more than a week, will continue to be all of those things before irreversibly acquiring the prefix of former.

Fittingly, that garbage can reeks of resentment, of terms broken – with the broom cast to the side, the cause is clear. This was the result of discontent; the rash, passionate response of an dismissed municipal worker. We can only speculate on the worker’s intentions in aiming for a “Bush.” But we’ve seen the garbage collectors around here – those bent old relics of this republic’s founding days are an excitable bunch, always testing their limits, letting your know their terms, always with that look of imminent unionization in their eyes. So after weeks the can remains, not to be removed by anyone, at least not by anyone who feels that disgruntled worker’s plight – and anyone who doesn’t wouldn’t want to get their hands dirty.

And now, with the block’s only trash can uprooted and removed from plain view, the streams of pedestrians find themselves undirected and with no choice but to revert to the old way of dropping their garbage wherever they please. Already there is a noticeable increase in the number of jettisoned chopsticks, cardboard noodle cups, and plastic bags littering the street. And later, when the garbage grows enough so that someone’s pink-eared Pekingese is hopelessly lost amid the heaps, the People will cry out against the messy state of things, demand explanations, and protest the lack of proper garbage receptacles – most likely, they will curse those lazy collectors, having forgotten long before the reason for that symbolic can’s replanting.

For a short time, the People will have a crusade again. They will not stand for garbage; there will be a proliferation of trash cans, recycle bins, and cleanliness campaign posters. And when order has been restored, back to the norm but under the name of progress, we will have once again a streamlined disposal system. Until it’s torn up again.

Sincerely,

This Ridiculous World

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