China-focused Satire, Social Commentary, Comics and More

China

Thank You China

Thank You China

Totally Awesome Picture of the Week 2.01 It’s about time we told you. We came back. A lot of famous things have been said about home: it’s “why I keep returning,” it’s “where I want to be,” it’s “always so exciting,” etc. All catchy ideas that I’ll admit to singing along with and perhaps even […]


The Fifth Modern Wonder of the World

The Fifth Modern Wonder of the World

Perhaps you missed the last visit of the majestically inbred boy-king of Egypt as he was hauled about the world for all to revere. And maybe you’ve never graced the great halls of the British Museum to look upon its chunks of Grecian monuments. Or stepped up to the mighty pyramids and been harassed into […]


Corn Juice for the Masses

Corn Juice for the Masses

Stuff People Ingest Voluntarily episode 31 Before you start accusing us of focusing on the poor, fading laundry as part of our own Antonioni scheme to sabotage the world’s image of an entire nation, let us be clear: we are more interested in the one small bright square so carefully preserved like some tiny peep […]


Face Value

Face Value

The Nanjing Galaxy Yacht Club floats securely in the yellowish, turbid water of the Yangtze River. The neighborhood – in the northwest of the city, far from the Ming Dynasty wall – is mostly industrial. Not far upstream is the famous Yangtze River Bridge, a dark, ominous shape stretching across the water. There are no […]


New Year Predictions

New Year Predictions

The niu year has now passed. While it may be inauspicious to go digging up old news and past grudges, a quick rummaging through our archives has revealed a few loose tigers, so to speak, which deserve a bit of the spotlight on this festive day. And perhaps they can help us in our unsolicited […]


This Ridiculous World Guide: China – Museums

This Ridiculous World Guide: China – Museums

Part One: The Patrons A Chinese museum is a fascinating place. Not because of the exhibitions of history. No, in a country with a heritage longer than that of Jesus the ubiquitousness of artifacts is less impressive than expected. Nowadays, with a proliferation of middle class Chinese people embracing all forms of consumerism, even intellectual, […]


What My Student Gave Me: an unabridged journal entry

May 20, 2008 – Yichang, China “Dazed morning at the primary school, raspy voice trying to read a book about butterflies over the constant murmurs of the students. One of my students, the one with the possessed eyes, has now given me a little ‘present’ – twice now. Actually, today before class he came up […]


What Are Sidewalks For? Answer #22

What Are Sidewalks For? Answer #22

Explosives Share this:


Dear Big Ants Who Were Bossing Around the Little Ants

Dear Big Ants Who Were Bossing Around the Little Ants, First, I must say that you look crazy up close. Sorry, but I have been a little off lately and have found that brushing aside distractions clears up a path towards almost clarity. Share this:


Prime Real Estate – Property # JSNJ012PRC

What this substantial piece of city land is doing unpaved and undeveloped is a mystery of commerce and real estate. Whatever the reason, that red flag piercing the mud surely indicates a coming edifice. A new age high rise, perhaps? Another shopping mall? Share this:


Students Undisturbed by Disturbance at Chinese High School

Nanjing, CHINA – After three days of continuous drilling the unidentified mustached man on the ladder finally made it through the cement and brick wall and into lucky classroom 8. Though his workspace partially blocked the steps of the entrance to the main building the man’s progress went unimpeded and unquestioned throughout. Students of class […]


This Ridiculous World Guide: China – Garbage Vessels

This Ridiculous World Guide: China - Garbage Vessels

Coming from America, or some nation similarly skilled in methods of clandestine waste removal – with magic, automatic flush toilets; color-coded trash bins; and troops of picker-uppers who carouse the streets in great machines with as much authority as fire engines – such unglamorous, undisguised removal may be a bit shocking. Here in this ancient […]


What Are Sidewalks For? Answer #21


Life of Pig: a fable

Two pigs beget one. Such is the way of pigs, as it has been since the beginning. In the first months, Pig rolls amid the muck, snorts his own excrement, and eats whatever morsels and collected orts are deposited into his sty. It is a base life, one of pure sensory perception, instinct, and consumption, […]


What We Could Sell if Only We Owned a Tricycle: Idea 15

What We Could Sell if Only We Owned a Tricycle: Idea 15

Oily Snacks for the Zoo-goers Share this:


The Fourth Modern Wonder of the World

The Fourth Modern Wonder of the World

Don’t make light of this folks! This sophisticated sorceress of polyester tunics and sequined stretch capris is more than a granny before her time! That’s right ladies and gentlemen, this here happy momma has more surprises than a Magic Marker and more class than an Asian high school student! You may have a difficult time […]


Summer in China – A Season for Leaving

Summer in China - A Season for Leaving

Totally Awesome Picture of the Week 67 When it’s 90 plus degrees with 100% humidity and your neighbor’s coal smoke is pumping along with the encephalitis mosquitoes through your broken window screen and down on the street the men who actually wear shirts have them rolled up past their nipples, while inside your apartment the […]


This Ridiculous World Guide: China – Rubble

This Ridiculous World Guide: China - Rubble

While most travelers come to this great land in order to see the famous structures it has erected – ancient walls, temples, and fortresses, or even the more recently built stadiums and towers – they regrettably miss out on another important, and arguably more impressive, sightseeing possibility. Here, not only can one witness marvels of […]


Dear Elephant Man

Dear Elephant Man, Perhaps you do not suffer from some debilitating, disfiguring deadly disease. Your face does not appear horribly mutated. No mind. This title is not meant to damage your self esteem. No, if it does you are too sensitive and maybe we have you wrong. We refer instead to the hue of your […]


What Are Sidewalks For? Answer #20


Signs of Thought 6


Traces of Progress: Foreign Treasures

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Prototype for Alaskan Attorney Discovered at the Chinese Museum

SLIGHTLY MORE PHOTOGENIC AS MAN Shanghai, CHINA – A bust of Eric T. Sanders, was recently found in the ancient sculpture wing of the Shanghai Museum. The well-preserved, roughly-carved giant head – which, incidentally, is often referred to as “The Judge” – was previously thought to be some sort of god, demon or school teacher. […]


The Third Modern Wonder of the World

The Third Modern Wonder of the World

Somewhere far from the ancient city wall, beyond the outskirts and ghettos and ghost towns, myth tells us of a magnificent metropolis of liquid delight. No foreign eye has ever beheld its interior, though a few claim to have reached its outer wall. There, it is said, the air is so dense from the evaporation […]