A deep, stentorian voice echoed through the dry canyon air. Laser beams scattered across the wide, flat surface, forming images to match the narrator’s tale: trampling mustangs of water, swooping eagles, the Statue of Liberty. It was a story of mythical proportions, the battle of man versus nature, national progress, and Democracy,...
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Totally Awesome Picture of the Week 68
In the dark corner of a far away forlorn church stand these three forgotten souls. Bruised, dirty, chipped and abandoned they doze like wallflowers in the shadows as patrons play hooky for every reason but lack of sin.
In their bright vestments creased with dust the saints and...
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(Flexing teenager on his snowmobile speaking to another teenager): “Hey Bobby, got tickets?.. To the Gun Show!”
Bobby: “You Betcha! See you in the gym.”
“Fun for everyone.” This ad was printed on the front page of the Sunday edition of Alaska’s largest newspaper, the Anchorage Daily News:
At least they’re encouraging the kids to read.
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Two pigs beget one. Such is the way of pigs, as it has been since the beginning. In the first months, Pig rolls amid the muck, snorts his own excrement, and eats whatever morsels and collected orts are deposited into his sty. It is a base life, one of pure sensory...
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SLIGHTLY MORE PHOTOGENIC AS MAN
Shanghai, CHINA – A bust of Eric T. Sanders, was recently found in the ancient sculpture wing of the Shanghai Museum. The well-preserved, roughly-carved giant head – which, incidentally, is often referred to as “The Judge” – was previously thought to be some sort of god, demon or school teacher....
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ENVISION THE FUTURE!
Behold! The future of warfare! As sleek as a fighter jet, as mobile as a Humvee, and just as necessary for the protection of Freedom and Democracy worldwide!
Having discovered the indubitable link between poverty and thrift and the proliferation of senseless dreams, the Department of National Dream...
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Dear “White Bear,”
WHITE BEAR! Your skin’s hue of Sprite bottles, severe seasickness, and apple candy is cause for concern. Your sallow belly is not hidden behind your crooked tie. Neither is that torso spanning scar. A vicious fight it must have been. Your American flag top hat, raised arms...
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Attention:
What to do if you come across a poster such as this one: smash, destroy, beat, bash, mutilate, hammer, ram, stomp, pound, or otherwise hit until you are certain that all dissenting messages have been fully eradicated! It is your duty as a citizen to protect the sanctity of street-side advertising panels –...
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The crumbling metal plow rolls slowly along its rusty tracks.
It has come from one place; it is going to another.
The sky is pure – the light falls sharply, drawing with precise contrast the shapes of leaves and trees, of cool striped railings, signposts, idling vehicles, and the eager, anticipating figures of two full-grown men.
Criminals.
Look...
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Pig flu? No, not China. Here the pigs flew.
In fact, I may have seen them.
Through the coal smoke haze
Rose a snouted cumulous storm of shadowy mystery
Accompanied by nightmarish squealing
Lightening flashed a butcher’s blade
And a warm rain commenced
It stabbed like sweat at open cuts
And turned my white shirt brown.
A second flash of the...
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